Film Quotes by James Garner

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You American haters bore me to tears, Ms. Barham. I've dealt with Europeans all my life. I know all about us parvenus from the States who come over here and race around your old Cathedral towns with our cameras and Coca-cola bottles... Brawl in your pubs, paw at your women, and act like we own the world. We over-tip, we talk too loud, we think we can buy anything with a Hershey bar. I've had Germans and Italians tell me how politically ingenuous we are, and perhaps so. But we haven't managed a Hitler or a Mussolini yet. I've had Frenchmen call me a savage because I only took half an hour for lunch. Hell, Ms. Barham, the only reason the French take two hours for lunch is because the service in their restaurants is lousy. The most tedious lot are you British. We crass Americans didn't introduce war into your little island. This war, Ms. Barham to which we Americans are so insensitive, is the result of 2,000 years of European greed, barbarism, superstition, and stupidity. Don't blame it on our Coca-cola bottles. Europe was a going brothel long before we came to town.

Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You know, I never realized what a sensual satisfaction grieving is for women.

Maj. Jefferson F. Pike: [Maj. Pike, Col. MacLean and Gen. Allison are debating the likelihood of the Nazis expecting the Allied invasion] "Time" magazine predicts it's going to be the first week of June. You know something, I have a hunch that, uh, German intelligence is almost as smart.

Nicholas Arden: Are you out of your mind?
Grace Arden: Just a little. I can't quite seem to adjust; two daughters-in-law for only one son.
Nicholas Arden: Well, as long as you had only one, why'd it have to be me?

Philip Marlowe: [after a goon has just ripped up his jacket] Does your mother know what you do for a living?

Philip Marlowe: [with a gun held on him] I like your perfume. What is it?

Philip Marlowe: Well, you're very impressive, Winslow, but I've seen dogs do better on television.

Philip Marlowe: You're light on your feet, Winslow. Are you just a little gay, huh?

Wyatt Earp (Tombstone city marshal: A man's life... for fifty dollars. I'm gonna give you a chance to make another fifty dolars.
Andy Warshaw: I don't want such a chance.
Wyatt Earp (Tombstone city marshal: My men will stay back. I'm gonna count one, two, three. You can draw on two - I'll wait to three. If you get me, my boys won't bother you.

Emily Barham: I believe in honor, service, courage, and fair play, and cricket, and all the other symbols of British character. Which have only civilized half the world!
Lt. Cmdr. Charles E. Madison: You British plundered half the world for your own profit, let's not pass it off as the age of enlightenment.