Walt Whittaker: [to Alison] Did your brother Fred come with you?
Walt Whittaker: Hi, Fred come in! I've got him now
[jumps on Kolchin's back]

- Carl Reiner (as Walt Whittaker) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)

Police Chief Link Mattocks: I thought all the nuts went home on Labor Day.

- Brian Keith (as Police Chief Link Mattocks) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)

Alice Foss, Telephone Operator: Well, I'm sorry to bother you, Chief Mattocks, but I just had a call from Muriel Everett.
Police Chief Link Mattocks: What is it, what's she want?
Alice Foss, Telephone Operator: She was shouting that I should call you, because according to her - well, Muriel said the Russians have landed!
Police Chief Link Mattocks: Want to give me that again, Alice?
Alice Foss, Telephone Operator: Muriel said the Russians have landed, whatever that means, Chief. And she said they were attacking her personally!
Police Chief Link Mattocks: Remember last time, when she called about that Peeping Tom - you know who that was, don't you? It was that Luther Grilk's horse.

- Brian Keith (as Police Chief Link Mattocks) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)

[after the Russians in the boat eluded capture]
Fendall Hawkins: I'm holding you responsible!
[draws sword]
Fendall Hawkins: As Commander of the Civilian Forces, in this emergency! I'm charging you with treason!
Police Chief Link Mattocks: Gimme that thing!
[grabs his sword and breaks it in half]
Fendall Hawkins: [half tearful-half enraged] That's a Dexter F. Mettles Memorial Sword.
Police Chief Link Mattocks: Yeah.
Fendall Hawkins: [enraged] You traitorous fink!
[goes for Mattocks, resulting in a brawl]

- Paul Ford (as Fendall Hawkins) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)

[after their submarine runs aground]
The Russian Captain: [in Russian; subtitled] Devil take it! What a mess! What a mess.

- Theodore Bikel (as The Russian captain) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)

[last lines]
Luther Grilk: [as he gallops through the slums] The Russians are coming! The Russians are coming!

- Ben Blue (as Luther Grilk) in The Russians Are Coming the Russians Are Coming (1966)