Chester: Have you ever considered getting married, sir?
Tom Bowen: I was engaged once.
Chester: What happened?
Tom Bowen: The girl changed her mind at the last minute.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Chester: Marriages are very healthy, sir. You see, married men live much longer than bachelors.
Tom Bowen: If that's true, they're only trying to outlive their wives so they can be bachelors again.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Tom Bowen: I wonder what the groom is doing today.
Ellen Bowen: Why don't you call him up and ask him?
Tom Bowen: Very funny.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Tom Bowen: You should have seen your face when you saw me.
Anne Ashmond: How did I look?
Tom Bowen: As if I were a dentist.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Irving Klinger: This is a pretty box of pickles!

- Keenan Wynn (as Irving Klinger / Edgar Klinger) in Royal Wedding (1951)

James Ashmond: Do I look like a gentleman?
Tom Bowen: You look like a banker.
James Ashmond: But do I look like a gentleman?

- Albert Sharpe (as James Ashmond) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Ellen Bowen: [referring to the royal couple] I wonder what the bride is doing today.
Tom Bowen: Why don't you call her up and ask her?
Ellen Bowen: [chuckles] I wonder what I would be doing a month before my wedding.
Tom Bowen: Probably trying to find a way out of it.
Ellen Bowen: Do you really think so?
Tom Bowen: You know you would.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)

Ellen Bowen: Didn't your mother never teach you no manners?
Tom Bowen: I never had no mother. We was too poor.

- Fred Astaire (as Tom Bowen) in Royal Wedding (1951)